Experiencing the Feeling of Aversion
Feeling of strong dislike or discomfort that creates an urge to pull away from something. It often shows up as a protective response to things perceived as unpleasant, threatening, or simply not right.
What is it about this situation or person that makes me want to pull away?
Is this reaction protecting me, or is it limiting me?
Could there be something deeper beneath this feeling?
What might curiosity help me uncover?
Aversion can be subtle or immediate. It may begin as a quiet discomfort and quickly build into a strong desire to escape a situation or stimulus. Sometimes it protects from real harm, like avoiding spoiled food or overwhelming noise. Other times, aversion can become automatic, linked to past experiences or ingrained responses that no longer serve. Recognizing when it is a signal of safety versus when it limits connection or growth is a powerful emotional skill.
What makes aversion especially interesting is its ability to shape behavior in small but lasting ways. Left unexamined, it may lead to avoidance—skipping conversations, withdrawing from certain people, or even suppressing opportunities for growth. Repeated enough times, this pattern can grow into isolation. Aversion that goes unchecked becomes a wall, sometimes protecting, sometimes imprisoning.
One idea that stood out in the episode is the link between aversion and anxiety. Aversion can act as a precursor, an early alert that something may lead to discomfort or danger. In that way, it attempts to prevent harm. But when it is based on imagined fears or old patterns, it might become a block rather than a guide. Curiosity becomes an essential mindset here, noticing the urge to pull away, and then gently asking what sits beneath the reaction.
Instead of trying to erase aversion, it can be helpful to work with it. Creating small disruptions, like adding music during a meal when sound is difficult, can create space between reaction and response. These moments of pause allow for more conscious choices, rather than automatic avoidance. When curiosity replaces judgment, there is a chance to understand more deeply, and sometimes, to stay connected even when something feels challenging.
Mindful Mindset
Aversion naturally urges separation, but mindfulness invites curiosity. When the impulse to withdraw appears, gently pause and ask what the body is reacting to. Is there discomfort, overwhelm, or a memory being triggered? Bringing awareness to these signals makes room for choice instead of automatic reaction.
Mindful Practices
A helpful way to work with aversion is to use the mindset of curiosity. Begin by noticing where aversion shows up in the body, a clench, a flinch, or an urge to turn away. Take a steady breath and soften attention around that space. If it feels safe, ask with openness, What am I feeling here? What might I be trying to protect?
By Princess Nicole Salas,
Princess Nicole Salas is a FeelWise Assistant with a passion for emotional intelligence, empathy, always exploring what it means to understand people more deeply. She loves watching movies and reading books. She believes even the quietest role can create meaningful impact and routed and care and intention.
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